Connor Wickham “in the dark” over basic criteria by which footballers are judged

Wickham Sunderland in the dark

(Photo: Getty Images)

This week Gareth Southgate announced his England under 21 squad for the side’s two upcoming internationals against Germany and the Czech Republic. Despite a spate of injuries to key forwards, there was no place in the side for Sunderland “striker” Connor Wickham. The player – playing in a piss poor Sunderland side admittedly – has been poor even by his side’s standards this season but still cannot fathom why he hasn’t been selected by his manager. The player was quoted as saying, “I’ve never spoken to anyone from the England set up for a while.” Ignoring the atrocious sentence structure adopted by the former Ipswich man, it suggests a basic misunderstanding about football as a game.

He continued in a later interview, “I dunno what the problem is. I’ve been running round loads and puffing my cheeks and making it look like I’ve been doing loads. I have a great feet-per-yards ratio as well as having a great jump leverage. Frankly I’m in the dark, metaphorically speaking that is.” Cheers for the little caveat there Connor. But all the metaphor explaining and presumably imaginary qualities won’t get away from the fact that to earn a call up, you have to have earned a call up, not just gotten one by being alive.

He later went on to explain what a good listener he is and how he cooks a mean stir fry and that if these attributes don’t earn a call up, then nothing will. Quite Connor, quite.

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