For more than a few months now former Notts County and Newcastle defender Sol Campbell has been beefing up his Tory credentials. Whether it’s been talking about mansion tax or the “banter” that comes with killing living beings, Sol has sought to ensure that none of us are in doubt that he’s a Tory, and a cunt.
Things took an even stranger turn today though as, just days after PM David Cameron claimed he was a distant relative of Kim Kardashian, Campbell has come out and claimed he is in fact the thirteenth cousin of none other than Katie Hopkins.
Yes, Katie Hopkins, the most offensive woman on Earth who will say anything she considers offensive enough to gain attention. Hopkins is the public face of everything you hate, whatever it is and although we at The Banter Narrative would never wish ill will upon anyone, we would very much like to see her get hit by a train. She also happens to be a Tory, and was once photographed alongside David Cameron. Campbell has claimed that he and Hopkins are relations, far removed, whose “great uncles were cousins and used to go shooting peasants and have banter together”.
Whether they are in fact cousins, or whether it’s just a publicity stunt remains to be seen. One thing’s for sure though, you really have to admire Campbell’s ambition to be seen as an even bigger cunt than he already is.
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