Out of shape football fan begrudgingly admits Women’s World Cup footballers might be more skilled than him


An out of shape football fan has begrudgingly admitted that the footballers taking part in the Women’s World Cup might be more skilled than him, according to sources close to the man.

John Clombs, from Battersea in south London, had been reluctant to reconsider his initial stance that he and ten friends could beat any of the teams competing in the Women’s World Cup. However, after several sombre looks at his waistline and amid intensifying pressure from his family, he has stated that that may in fact not be the case.

“I maintain that they make certain choices in games that I personally would not. But, still, I guess they’re pretty decent,” he said to close friends recently.

Clombs, a 29 year old IT consultant, played for a local amateur side for from the age of 14 to the age of 17 when, as he says, “The party lifestyle took over.” Despite not playing any form of the game for over a decade, he considers himself a rough diamond and insists regularly that “form is temporary, but class is permanent”.

His view on the Women’s World Cup had been so vehement prior to his admission that, friends say, he’d even begun to convince them.

“John’s really out of shape, like really. But he knows his football. He felt so strongly about this that we all thought, given the opportunity, we could do it,” said his close friend Peter Scarnd. “His change of opinion has left us reeling.”

Despite his change of heart, Clombs still feels that were he to get into shape, he thinks he’d give them a good game. “It’s all about physique. I played football for three years and your body doesn’t forget that.”

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