Rest of Premier League clubs furious as Swansea subsidises away tickets


The other 19 Premier League teams are said to be utterly furious with Swansea City for making them “look like twats” after the Welsh club announced plans to subsidise tickets for fans travelling to away games, according to sources.

The chairmen of the Premier League’s other clubs convened an emergency meeting this afternoon to discuss damage limitation and how to deal with what they call a “disgusting display” from Swansea.

“This is absolutely sickening,” said Arsenal chief executive Ivan Gazidis. “Swansea, being one of the league’s smaller teams, are making the rest of us look like dickheads.”

Tottenham Hotspur chief executive Daniel Levy echoed those sentiments. “For so long we’d been able to operate under the pretence that subsidies were unaffordable. Those fucking Welsh had to go and blow the whole thing.”

At press time, many clubs were considering their options, with Manchester United said to be contemplating subsidising chocolate bars at the shops in Old Trafford. West Ham meanwhile have discussed the possibility of giving away soapy water for free for a set period of time.

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