Arsenal awarded Premier League title after Mesut Ozil completes 10 chewing gum keepie-uppies


Describing the decision as “admittedly unprecedented but wholly deserved”, the Premier League title has been awarded to Arsenal today after midfielder Mesut Ozil completed 10 chewing gum keepie-uppies in a row.

Speaking at an impromptu press conference this afternoon, chief executive Richard Scudamore hailed the German attacker’s ability to juggle the gum and kick it back into his mouth “without dropping it even once”.

“Yes, Leicester are top and Tottenham just behind them, but look at the skill. The flicks, the wink at the camera,” said Scudamore, adding that Ozil’s skill was symbolic of all that was great with “the best league in the world”.

“This piece of skill shows exactly why this young man is the best around and why his side are deserving of the title. Football isn’t about consistency across the whole season but individual and isolate moments of skill.”

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