“Wayne Rooney is a natural midfielder,” says man who still retains ability to see


Saying that it feels like the Manchester United captain has been playing in the role for his entire life, a football fan who still retains the ability to see with his eyes today expressed his belief that Wayne Rooney is a natural midfielder.

Speaking after months of using his functioning power of sight to watch Rooney play in midfield for both club and country, 27-year-old Kevin Curry admitted that he had rarely seen a better centre-midfielder in all his days of being physically capable of viewing events.

“The positioning, the passing, the vision, it’s like watching Andres Iniesta,” said the man who, according to his medical records, was born with near perfect vision and has never suffered injuries to any area of his eyes.

“Of course, he’s still a world class striker but it’s just nice to have a player who is truly top level in more than one position.”

At press time, the man, who also has the ability to form thoughts of his own volition, revealed that, if anything, Rooney has improved as he’s gotten older.