Cursing what he described as an utterly unsatisfactory and embarrassing performance, local man Peter Clipper today expressed disgust at himself for fitting in just three hours of fantasy football tinkering during his work day.
The 29-year-old had initially planned to spend “at least half the day” reevaluating his squad and drawing up alternatives in the event of injury to key players.
However, upon arriving at his desk shortly after 9am, the insurance salesman found himself squandering more than five precious hours on menial tasks including calling clients and attending compulsory meetings.
“I absolutely blew it. I’m such a loser,” said the avid fantasy footballer competitor, who regularly regales colleagues with tales of his escapades during the 2012/13 season, during which he reached the heady heights of 1,000th in the world. “I really need to get better at organising my time so I don’t waste it on crap like this.”
“This is just like last night. I could’ve gotten so much done then but instead I just frittered it all away,” added Clipper of the four-hour spell he spent with having dinner with his family, many of whom he hadn’t seen in more than two months. “I’ll never make my way up the ladder if I can’t prioritise the important things.”
At press time, sources claim Clipper’s mood had improved immeasurably after deciding to phone in sick the next day and “focus on something that actually effects [his] life”.