Fresh disappointment for Wayne Rooney as striker loses place at head of table to son


A disappointed Rooney has accepted the decision and pledged to fight for his place at the top of the table.

Saying that he accepted the decision but that he was disappointed nonetheless, Wayne Rooney was subject to fresh disappointment today after reportedly losing his place at the head of his family’s dinner table to his son.

Speaking after the decision was made, the Manchester United captain cut a magnanimous figure, but vowed to do all he could to retain his spot later in the year.

“I had a feeling this was coming but it still stings a little bit, I must admit. I’ve not been at my best over the last few months and Kai has really stepped it up in terms of setting the table, passing the spuds and managing to keep gravy from pouring down his face and clothes,” said the forward, pinpointing that September’s incident involving a bread basket, candle and several fire extinguishers may have been the decisive factor.

“I wish Kai all the best in his role and I’ll be here ready to step up when needed. Right now it’s about working hard and being ready to help out.”

At press time, Rooney’s family were reportedly considering demoting him to separate table altogether after he ate his napkin while waiting for dinner to be served.