Saying that it would really help him out at a tough time, Alan Pardew today admitted that he really hopes Crystal Palace’s American owners are as clueless about football as he claimed two weeks ago.
Speaking shortly after his side’s 22nd league defeat in 2016, the former West Ham coach revealed that it would ease the pressure on him if the new majority shareholders have as loose a grasp on the rules of the game as he told reporters on December 4.
“I’m not going to lie, things aren’t too rosy here at the minute. We’ve lost a lot of games and confidence is low, so I am kind of banking on the Yanks being every bit as ignorant about the sport as I said they were,” said Pardew, adding that if, for example, they believed that 22 defeats in a calendar year is something that all managers experience, it would alleviate plenty of tension.
“Now – I know it’s unlikely – but if the owners were somehow under the impression that you actually get a point for a defeat, or that it’s actually illegal to sack a manager during the season, I’d be onto a winner.”
At press time, a smiling Pardew began pumping his fists in celebration at the sight of his bosses in the hope that his gesticulations would convince them their defeat had been welcome.