Saying that it was a disgrace to see referees and linesmen act in an undignified way usually reserved only for him, Jose Mourinho today expressed outrage at being mistreated by the very same officials he has mistreated for years.
Speaking after yet another result which left his Manchester United side with a mountain to climb in their pursuit of Champions League, the Portuguese coach hit out at the FA for having the temerity to hold his previous indiscretions against him dealing with disciplinary matters and decisions on and off the pitch.
“All the rules for me are different when it comes to officials. And for what? Because I’ve engaged in a near decade-long paranoid vendetta against those who officiate? Just because I’ve questioned their integrity they feel they can treat me like this?” queried the ex-Real Madrid coach, adding that it was disappointing to see such prejudice purely based on a person’s long history of abusing referees.
“I am told to sit down or I will be sent to the stands for speaking in a normal way to the fourth official. It seems like these men have skin too thin to deal with a little fun or years of public ridicule over their ability to do their jobs.”
At press time, Mourinho is said to have experienced a brief epiphany over his behaviour, before quickly deciding it must have been yet another example of the FA’s mind control tactics against him.