Ominously arriving in London having travelled the entire night, journalist Duncan Castles today broke into the West London home of Antonio Conte to deliver a final warning to the Chelsea manager.
Soaked to the skin and reportedly livid at what he considers “gross disrespect to the greatest manager of all time”, the Scottish football writer and Jose Mourinho admirer is said to have embarked on his journey to the affluent area of the capital in a bid to prevent Conte from criticising the Manchester United manager further, after a weeks-long row between the pair which has seen increasingly personal barbs exchanged.
“Hello Antonio. Why the look of shock? You must have known that I’d arrive at some point. I mean, surely you didn’t think I could let you run your mouth for this long?” said The Times writer as he accosted the terrified Italian in the kitchen of his multi-million pound townhouse, having previously climbed up a water pipe before entering through an unlocked second-floor window.
“You may think you can say what you want about Jose, but he is not alone. He has friends, family and lovers who will stop at nothing to defend his honour. Do you understand what I’m saying to you?!”
At press time, Conte – who authorities say had several hair plugs torn out by Castles – had reportedly promised not to say another bad word about Mourinho providing the “weird bald man” left him alone forever.