spurs shoe box

Emotional Spurs staff remove trophy shoe box from White Hart Lane

In an act described by some as the most difficult aspect of a historic day, emotional staff members at Tottenham Hotspur today removed the trophy shoe box from White Hart Lane. Speaking after the London club’s final home match at…

sam allardyce fucked

Big Sam formally commits to “getting fucked up” tonight

Saying that he and the board had come to an agreement earlier today, Sam Allardyce has formally committed to “getting fucked up” tonight after securing Crystal Palace’s place in the Premier League. Speaking after his side’s comprehensive victory against Hull…

castles family

Duncan Castles disowns family over criticism of Mourinho style

Describing their actions as “treasonous” and “heartless”, Duncan Castles reportedly disowned his family today due to remarks made about the style of football played by Jose Mourinho’s Manchester United side. According to sources close to the Scottish journalist, Castles had…